Categories: Domestic Violence

My Ex Is Filing For a Modification. Can I Bring Up The Domestic Violence From Our Marriage In My Response?

Alec and Lydia Act | Modification and Past Domestic Violence

My Ex Is Filing For a Modification. Can I Bring Up The Domestic Violence From Our Marriage In My Response?

Your ex filed to modify custody. You can raise the domestic violence from your marriage, even if it is old and even if it was already decided.

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Key takeaway

Yes. And this is one of the few ways back into court where you get to talk about all of it.

You may have spent years thinking that door was closed. The divorce is final. The decree is signed. Nobody wanted to hear about it then, or you were told it was not relevant, or you never raised it at all because you were trying to get your divorce finalized. Then your ex files to try and modify parenting time and suddenly you are back in a courtroom.

It Applies Even Though Your Case Is Old

The Alec and Lydia Act was enacted on June 22, 2026 and we believe it applies to every hearing in front of family court after June 22, 2026 no matter when it was filed. (see our article about when the Alec and Lydia Act applies) It is not limited to new divorces or new filings. When domestic violence is alleged, it triggers all the provisions in the Alec and Lydia Act and there are certain mandates about what a family law court must do.

There are real changes. It is ground breaking legislation to protect children. It is now the public policy of Arizona to put children first over parental access.

What The Family Court Must Do Once Domestic Violence is Found

Once you prove domestic violence by a preponderance of the evidence, which means more likely than not, the Alec and Lydia Act creates a mandatory rebuttable presumption that an award of legal decision-making or parenting time to the abuser is contrary to your child’s best interests.

If the presumption is not rebutted, the court shall not grant joint legal decision-making or sole legal decision-making authority to the abuser.

And the court shall impose restrictions on the manner and frequency of the abuser’s interactions with your child. These are the safeguards and they come from a specific list in the Alec and Lydia Act.

  1. Exchanges of your child in a protected location or safe exchange location specified by the court
  2. Limits on parenting time, including a prohibition on overnight parenting time
  3. Supervised parenting time by a professional agency or designated persons. You may not be appointed as the supervisor
  4. An order that he pay the cost of supervised parenting time
  5. Suspension of access to your child, in any form, until he petitions the court to modify
  6. Completion of a program of intervention for perpetrators of domestic violence, and any other counseling the court orders
  7. If the court also finds he abused alcohol, other intoxicants or controlled substances, an order that he abstain
  8. A bond for your child’s safe return
  9. An order that your address and your child’s address remain confidential
  10. Any other condition the court determines is necessary to protect your child, you, and any other family or household member

Domestic Violence Includes Coercive Control

When most people hear domestic violence they picture being physically harmed. That can be part of it. Domestic violence now expressly includes coercive control, which is a pattern of threatening, humiliating or intimidating actions used to harm, punish or frighten a person. It includes:

  • Isolating you from your friends and your family
  • Taking away your independence
  • Controlling what you do every day
  • Monitoring your phone, your messages, your money and where you go
  • Controlling your access to money, resources or services
  • Name calling and putting you down on a frequent basis
  • Threatening to harm you, your child or someone you love
  • Threatening to harm a pet
  • Threatening to share private or sexual images of you
  • Damaging your belongings

If this is part of your history, it is now very relevant for proving domestic violence.

What This Means For You

Maybe he or she filed to get something or perhaps just to harass you. Maybe he or she is angry that you did not give him or her more time than what is in your parenting plan. The end result is that this filing also put domestic violence and your child’s best interests in front of a judge again, under a new law, with new mandates in the family law court.

Talk to Tali

Tali Best Collins handles every new client consultation personally. You do not need to have it all figured out before you call. You just need your story. We can help.

Talk to Tali

Talk to Tali. bestlawaz.com/talk-to-tali | (480) 219-2433

About the Author

Tali Best Collins is the Managing Partner of Best Law Firm in Scottsdale, Arizona, where she and her colleagues have practiced family law exclusively for over nineteen years. She is a former Judge Pro Tem in Maricopa County Superior Court and co-author of The Divorce Coach. Tali handles every new client consultation personally and is a trauma informed attorney.

bestlawaz.com/talk-to-tali | (480) 219-2433

This article is for general information only and is not legal advice.

Tali Collins

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