The High Road

Cindy Best

You are going through a really difficult time. Your soon to be former spouse/significant other is doing all kinds of things to make life miserable. You want to retaliate. You want to strike back. You want to make them miserable also. You want to call them names. You want to tell other people what a jerk he or she is. You want to tell your children all the bad things their parent has done to you. You want to destroy their property and have it go “missing.” You really do feel like doing most of these things. Don’t. Just don’t.

We always want our clients to take the high road. That does not make us weak or unable to protect your rights. It does not cause you to lose what you want. In fact, it does just the opposite. When you take the high road, you become calmer, the other side becomes calmer and when they are calmer, we get more done. We get more agreements. We get them to hopefully come to the table to resolve issues. We get them to be nicer; sometimes. We want to start on the high road and end on the high road. We had a client once who called just to ask us when he could get off the high road…we said: never. And, we were able to settle on favorable terms. And, in the end, our client felt better about himself. His children never heard from him about the conflict.

But let’s just say that we take the high road and they do not. They do not get calmer or more resolution focused. They end up fighting about everything. Then, we end up having to go to court to let a judge decide the issues about your family.

I would rather go into court and explain our case to a Judge after we have taken the high road. I would rather be us than the other side who was unreasonable and pulled all kinds of antics. Because eventually, the decision maker who is the Judge, will look at what we have done and what they have done. The Judge will want to know what side was reasonable and what side was not. I would always much rather be in the shoes that walked the high road.

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