There is always a lot written about the children over the holidays. But this blog is about you, the parent, who may have gone through a transition in your family this past year or recently. If you have been divorced this year, everything has changed. And, yes, Christmas and the holidays have a great emphasis on children. But nothing will be fine for your kids if you are not fine. You might be grieving the loss of your family and that is OK. Know that you might feel down and be fine with that. But also focus on taking care of yourself: drink water, take your vitamins, exercise, even just take a walk every night. And go easy on sugars and alcohol. Eat right. And feel free to say no. You might have traditions that you just don’t do this year. Maybe you are too tired to send cards and that is OK. Maybe you and your children will make new traditions. This might be your year that the kids are with the other parent. Maybe you make your Christmas or celebration some other day. Maybe you used to have an elaborate dinner but from now on you want just seafood or a Mexican dinner. A new tradition helps you get upstuck. Focus on doing less and less stressful things, enjoy your children, do something for yourself. And most of all, be nice to yourself, that is a wonderful gift you can give your kids.